The Pacifist
by Electric Snowball
Summary: Do all shinobi have to be violent? What if one was a pacifist? What if she hated hurting people?
1. Chapter 1

**This story popped into my head after reading a story about a particularly violent shinobi. Then I thought; do all shinobi have to be violent? What if one was a pacifist? What if she hated hurting people?**

'_thinking'_

"speaking"

_flashback_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

**Chapter 1**

Zumi stood by the window, looking out on the streets of Konoha from her apartment. The wind played with her short, spiky, auburn hair, and she closed her eyes at the feeling. Today she was going to take the graduation test at the ninja academy, and she wanted to make sure she was at her best.

She pulled her head back inside, and proceeded to get dressed. As she pulled her ninja clothes off the rack, she tried not to let herself think of the main reason she had to pass today.

'_If I don't pass, oka san and nii chan will be really disappointed in me. And when they get angry, they get violent.'_

Unconsciously, she rubbed the fading bruise on her arm.

_She opened the door to her house, and found her mother and sister standing just inside. They both had their hands on their hips and looked very angry. Her mother strode forward and grabbed the collar of Zumi's shirt. She lifted her up and shook her._

"_What were you thinking?! Why didn't you kill that little brat! It was your right! You had bested him in a fair contest!"_

"_I just couldn't, he looked so scared…"_

She shook her head, eyes moist already.

'_This is what oka san and nii chan are talking about, Zumi, you are so weak, you cry over a memory! You will never pass.'_

She finished getting dressed and stood up defiantly.

'_I will pass. I will show everyone I don't have to hurt anyone to be strong.'_


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you to all my reviewers

**Thank you to all my reviewers! I wasn't going to update until finals were over, but you guys have convinced me to put off my studying for a bit.**

'_thinking'_

"speaking"

_flashback_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

**Chapter 2**

Zumi sat in her usual seat in the classroom. It wasn't in the front, nor was it in the back. She sat in the middle row by the window. She had learned that not drawing attention to herself was usually the safest way to go.

Iruka walked in and stood. He observed the class for the moment, and sighed. His eyes were sad as his usual bright grin was replaced by an expression close to that of a kid who had to give away his puppy.

"Well, class, if you pass the graduation exam, this will be your last time in this classroom.

Now Iruka looked ready to cry.

"You'll leave me! You'll go out into the world and become a shinobi! And I won't be able to teach you anymore! You'll have a new sensei! And you could," he gasped and started to sob. "You could die!!"

Zumi rolled her eyes. Iruka could be sort of overprotective sometimes. She surprised herself by realizing that, _when_ she passed, this classroom, with the quiet swish of brushes and Iruka-sensei always hovering, always worrying, would be one of the things she would miss most.

When she had zoned back in, they were lining up to take the exam. Zumi positioned herself in the middle again. As Iruka called them up, she leaned against the wall to study her classmates' performances. As always, that loudmouth Naruto was first. He failed. Then a couple more went, and it was her turn.

"Shirakawa Zumi."

She walked to the middle of the room and put her hands in the dog sign, then the tiger, then the boar. She concentrated her chakra, and briefly disappeared in a cloud of smoke to reappear as the Third Hokage. Iruka nodded at her, and she dispelled it.

She sat back down at her seat and resumed staring out the window nonchalantly. And she really wasn't excited. She had won, for now. But the cycle would never end. There would always be another test, another task, and someday, she would fail. There was nothing to celebrate to day as she had merely kept afloat for another day.

After everyone was done, Iruka passed out their headbands, making a big speech about how they were shinobi of the leaf now, the few, the proud, the blahblahblah.

"Hey Zumi, congrats."

Zumi turned to face Nara Shikamaru. She checked his face for hostility, and seeing an apparent lack in his bored expression, decided it would be safe to answer.

"Thank you."

She turned away, conversation over. He shrugged at her lack of interest, and turned away. She treated all her classmates similar. She was simply not interested. At first, Ino had tried to become friends, but when she realized that shopping, the latest hairstyles, boys and gossip bored her, she gave it up as a lost cause.

Later, after class was over, Zumi let herself into her apartment. Seeing no one else around, she tried to sneak up to her room. Unfortunately, she had forgotten about her sister's excellent chakra detection skills.

"Brat, I see you passed."

Her sister appeared at the top of the stairs. She pointedly looked at Zumi's new headband where it was wrapped around her left thigh.

"So you made it today. Someday, however, you will be forced to kill or be killed. Someday, you will fail."

She disappeared as fast as she had come, leaving Zumi to herself. Zumi walked up the stairs, stiffly, her lip trembling.

'_I will not cry. I am not disappointed. I knew that I would not be congratulated, I should be glad oka-san did not show up, her temper flares much quicker that nii-chan's. They did not hurt me today.'_

Finally, in the safety of her room, Zumi let go of the stoic façade she had held all day and cried into her pillow. Finally, after taking a short nap, she crept downstairs to grab a snack, ate it, and then quickly ran back up. Since no one stopped her, her mother and sister must have decided to let her be for the rest of today.

She then fell asleep curled up on her bed.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you to all my reviewers! Can you please tell me if I got a detail wrong? I couldn't really remember exactly how graduation went at the academy.**

'_thinking'_

"speaking"

_flashback_

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto**

**Chapter 3**

Zumi got up with the sun and dressed for the day. She grabbed a few of the essential ninja tools and put them in her pack. She also put on her headband on her thigh as before. She had to be prepared today because it wasn't over. She would learn who her new team was today at the explanatory meeting.

She stole out of the house, opting to skip out on breakfast if it meant no confrontations with her mother and sister. They were bad-tempered in the morning. It would be better if she didn't wake them up.

She made it to the academy without incident and sat in her seat in the classroom for the explanatory meeting. A few girls came in, and instead of sitting down, they clustered around Sakura's desk in the front and squealed to each other about who was going to be on Sasuke's team. They were talking very animatedly, and Zumi immediately turned to face the window. She could never have friends like that, she knew. She would never be allowed to go to anyone else's house and certainly no one could ever come to hers.

Just then, shy Hinata came up to her desk and twiddled her fingers a bit before speaking.

"Zumi-san, who do you hope you'll be on a team with? I hope I'm with Naruto-kun! I heard he passed last night after something happened with that weird teacher who teaches the younger kids? Apparently he can do shadow clones!"

Her small face glowed with simple happiness for someone else.

Zumi was suddenly angry. This little, shy, fragile, girl could afford to be happy for someone. She could look up to someone without fearing disappointment. She was protected. Why couldn't she see that she shouldn't rest her hopes on someone else?

"No. I do not hope for anything. Just go away will you? You're making me sick."

Zumi said it quite meanly and Hinata's face fell. She quickly apologized and scurried off. Zumi, instead of feeling better, now really felt sick. She hated herself. She put her head down on her desk to hide the sudden tears in her eyes.

Now finally, Iruka came in. Though he was not sobbing at the moment, his eyes were red-rimmed and he kept blowing his nose.

"There will be four teams. I will split you all up based on who will work best together. There will be two boys and a girl on each team."

He stated this through clenched teeth with the air of a memorized statement. Then, he began to simply call out names.

"Team 6. Yamanaka Ino, Nara Shikamaru, Akimichi Chouji.

Team 7. Uzimaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura, Uchiha Sasuke.

Team 8. Aburame Shino, Hyuuga Hinata, Inuzuka Kiba.

Team 9. Akisashi Seiji, Haruseki Zumi, Maziki Sota.

Zumi looked over to her new teammates in surprise at the same time as they did. She had never really noticed either of them. Seiji was inclined to sit quietly in the back and Sota always looked like he was half asleep.

She now noted that Seiji had light grey eyes and although not what was usually considered handsome, he was very nice looking. He was dressed in a traditional navy yukata. No one else was wearing traditional clothes of any sort. He sat up perfectly straight.

To Zumi's eyes, Sota looked, well, pretty stupid, just sitting there with a bored and staring off into space. He had a dreamer's hazel eyes and very tanned skin. Plain brown hair left long pooled around his shoulders. He was wearing grey shorts, nothing special, and a plain lime green t-shirt. She wondered if he had even heard a word Iruka had said.

Her question was answered by his sudden rapid blinking. He then turned away again and fell back into a stupor. Seiji just nodded at her and looked away.

'_Just great.'_

Her thoughts were not sarcastic at all. She preferred people who didn't talk much and left her alone. She tuned back in for the names of their new sensei.

"And Tsuruoka Michiko will be leading Team 9. That is all for today, everyone is dismissed to their training ground for today. The list is on the board."

Sure enough, Zumi could see a short list taped to the blackboard behind Iruka. When everyone else stood up, she stayed seated. She would wait until everyone else had left. No sense in rushing anything.

When the only person left in the room was a napping Shikamaru, she got up to check the slip of paper. Her team was at training grounds number 19. She then turned and walked out of the room without looking back. Never again would Zumi sit at her desk in that room.


End file.
